Betrayal Recovery Starting Inventory | Sagebrush Counseling

Betrayal Recovery · Worksheet One

Betrayal Recovery Starting Inventory

An honest picture of where you are right now as you begin betrayal recovery. There are no right answers here, only true ones.

A note on this inventory. This is not a test and there are no right answers. It is a snapshot — an honest record of where you are starting. You will complete a second version of this later in the process, and comparing the two will show you things that are hard to see from inside the process. Answer as honestly as you can. You can share as much or as little with your therapist as feels right.

Section One

Where you are right now

A picture of your emotional and physical state as you begin this work. Honesty here — even if what's true is messy or contradictory — is more useful than any answer you think you should give.

Rate where you are today

In a few sentences — how would you describe where you are right now? Not the facts of what happened, but where you are inside yourself today.

How are you functioning in daily life right now — work, sleep, eating, basic tasks? What is hardest?

How is this living in your body? Where do you feel it physically?

Section Two

What happened — in your own words

This section is yours to complete privately, or to share in session. Write as much or as little as feels right. The goal is not a complete account — it is your account, from the inside.

Describe what happened — not just the facts, but how you experienced it. What was the moment of finding out like? You don't have to be complete or organized here. Write what comes.

What has the time since finding out been like? What has the range of experience been — the darkest moments, the confusing ones, the unexpected ones?

What is the single hardest thing you are carrying right now — the thought, the image, the question, or the loss that is most present for you?

You don't have to explain it — just name it:

"The thing that is hardest to carry right now is _____________"

What questions are you most haunted by right now — questions you keep asking yourself, whether or not they have answers?

Section Three

The relationship — before and now

Understanding the relationship before the betrayal, and how you see it now, helps map where the work needs to go. Answer from where you actually are, not where you wish you were.

How would you describe your relationship before the betrayal? What was working, what wasn't, and what, if anything, did you sense but not name?

How do you see the relationship right now? What do you still feel for your partner — and what has changed?

Where are you with the decision of whether to stay or go? You are not required to know. But name where you actually are.

You may be in more than one place at once — that's real:

"When I'm honest with myself, what I know right now is _____________ — and what I don't know yet is _____________"

Section Four

What this has done to how you see yourself

Betrayal rarely stays in the relationship — it usually lands somewhere in the person who was hurt. How you see yourself right now matters for the work ahead.

How has this changed how you see yourself — your worth, your judgment, your trust in your own perceptions?

Common experiences — any of these resonate?

"Since this happened, I have found myself questioning _____________"

Is there any part of this where you've found yourself feeling shame, self-blame, or the sense that this is somehow about your worth? Be honest.

What is still solid in you right now — what part of yourself have you been able to hold onto or return to, even through this?

Section Five

What you're hoping for — and afraid of

What you bring to therapy — including your fears about it — shapes how the work unfolds. Name both honestly.

What I'm hoping for from this work

What I'm afraid of

Have you been in therapy before? What has been helpful, and what hasn't? Is there anything you want your therapist to know about how you work?

If there is one thing you most need from this process — one outcome, one shift, one thing you most want to be different on the other side — what is it?

Say it plainly:

"The one thing I most need from this work is _____________"

Section Six

Your support and what you're carrying alone

Knowing what support you have — and what you're carrying without support — helps us understand the full context of what you're navigating.

Who knows about this? Who are you able to talk to, and who are you keeping this from — and why?

What are you carrying entirely alone that no one else knows about?

How are you coping right now?

Check everything that applies — including things that aren't helping:

Anything else about how you're getting through each day that feels important to name?

Section Seven — For Our Work Together

What would help me most

These questions help your therapist understand how to be most useful to you — not in general, but specifically for you, in this situation, right now.

What kind of support are you most hoping for right now — someone to help you process your feelings, figure out what you want, understand what happened, or something else?

Is there anything you're not ready to go into yet — areas you want to flag as things you'd like to approach slowly or not at all for now?

Is there anything else you want your therapist to know about you, your situation, or your history that feels relevant to this work?

If you are navigating betrayal and looking for professional support, Sagebrush Counseling is here. Reach out today. Licensed in Texas, New Hampshire, Maine, and Montana.

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