How Secure Is Your Attachment as a Couple? Quiz

How Secure Is Your Attachment as a Couple?

Professional Disclaimer: This quiz is designed for educational and self-reflection purposes only. It is not a diagnostic tool and cannot replace professional assessment or counseling. The results provide general insights based on attachment theory research. For personalized guidance about your relationship, please consult with a licensed couples therapist or relationship counselor.

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1

When you're feeling stressed or overwhelmed, how often do you turn to your partner for comfort and support?

Almost always - they're my first source of comfort Often - I feel comfortable reaching out most of the time Sometimes - I'm not always sure they'll be there for me Rarely or never - I prefer to handle stress on my own

2

How comfortable are you with sharing your deepest feelings, fears, and vulnerabilities with your partner?

Very comfortable - I can share anything without fear of judgment Mostly comfortable - I share most things but hold some back Somewhat uncomfortable - I worry about being too vulnerable Very uncomfortable - I prefer to keep my deeper feelings to myself

3

When you and your partner are apart, how do you typically feel?

Comfortable and secure - I trust they'll return and miss me Generally fine - I might miss them but feel okay Anxious or worried - I need frequent reassurance they're thinking of me Relieved - I appreciate the independence and personal space

4

During conflicts or disagreements, how does your relationship typically handle resolution?

We discuss issues calmly and work together to find solutions We eventually work it out, though it might take some time Conflicts often escalate or one of us shuts down emotionally We avoid conflicts or they remain unresolved for long periods

5

How consistently does your partner respond to your emotional needs and bids for attention?

Very consistently - they notice and respond to my needs reliably Usually responsive - they respond most of the time Inconsistently - I'm never quite sure if they'll be there Rarely responsive - I often feel ignored or dismissed

6

How do you feel about the balance of independence and togetherness in your relationship?

Well-balanced - we enjoy closeness and maintain healthy independence Mostly balanced - occasional tension but generally works well Unbalanced - I want more closeness or feel smothered Problematic - we struggle significantly with this balance

7

When your partner is upset or struggling, how do you typically respond?

I move toward them with empathy and offer support I try to help but sometimes feel unsure how I feel uncomfortable and may withdraw or minimize their feelings I tend to pull away or feel overwhelmed by their emotions

8

How often do you worry about your partner's commitment to the relationship?

Rarely or never - I feel secure in their commitment Occasionally - only during specific stressful situations Frequently - I often need reassurance about their feelings I don't think much about commitment or prefer not to focus on it

9

How comfortable are you with physical affection and intimacy in your relationship?

Very comfortable - physical closeness feels natural and safe Generally comfortable - I enjoy it most of the time Sometimes uncomfortable - I have mixed feelings about closeness Often uncomfortable - I prefer more physical distance

10

When making important decisions, how do you and your partner work together?

We collaborate as a team, valuing each other's input equally We usually consult each other but may have some tension We struggle to make decisions together without conflict We often make important decisions independently

11

How does your relationship handle life transitions and changes (job changes, moves, family issues)?

We face changes together and support each other through transitions We manage transitions fairly well with some stress Changes create significant tension and disconnection between us We tend to handle life changes separately rather than together

12

How do you feel about discussing your relationship's future together?

Excited and comfortable - we openly plan our future together Somewhat comfortable - we discuss it but not always in depth Anxious or uncertain - future discussions feel stressful Avoidant - I prefer not to think too far ahead about "us"

13

When you need personal space or time alone, how does your relationship handle this?

It's respected and understood - we both honor each other's needs Usually respected - though communication could be clearer Creates tension - one of us feels rejected or clingy We spend most of our time apart or avoid closeness

14

How do you typically react when your partner doesn't respond to texts or calls right away?

I'm patient and trust they'll respond when they can I'm fine unless it becomes a pattern or takes too long I feel anxious and may send follow-up messages I don't really mind or expect immediate responses

15

How would you describe trust in your relationship?

Strong and mutual - we trust each other completely Generally good - with minor occasional doubts Fragile - I often have doubts or need reassurance Difficult - trust has been broken or is hard to establish

16

When remembering past conflicts, how do you feel about how they were handled?

Confident - we've grown stronger through resolving past issues Mixed feelings - some were resolved well, others not as much Disappointed - conflicts left emotional wounds or weren't truly resolved Detached - I don't dwell on past conflicts much

17

How comfortable are you asking your partner for help with practical or emotional needs?

Very comfortable - I know they want to help and support me Fairly comfortable - though I sometimes hesitate Uncomfortable - I worry about being a burden Very uncomfortable - I strongly prefer self-reliance

18

How does jealousy or insecurity show up in your relationship?

Rarely - we both feel secure and trust each other Occasionally - we can talk through insecurities when they arise Frequently - jealousy creates tension or controlling behaviors Not much - we maintain significant independence or distance

19

When your partner shares good news or achievements, how do you typically respond?

Enthusiastically supportive - I celebrate their successes wholeheartedly Supportive - I'm happy for them most of the time Mixed feelings - sometimes I feel competitive or insecure Muted response - I acknowledge it but don't show much emotion

20

Overall, how would you describe your emotional connection with your partner?

Deep and secure - we understand each other on a profound level Good overall - with room for deeper connection Inconsistent - moments of closeness mixed with disconnection Distant - we function more as roommates than intimate partners

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Your Attachment Security Results

Understanding the Benefits of Professional Support

Couples Counseling Benefits

• Addresses relationship dynamics and patterns together
• Improves communication and conflict resolution skills
• Creates a safe space for both partners to be heard
• Builds secure attachment patterns as a team
• Strengthens emotional intimacy and connection
• Provides tools for navigating life transitions together
• Helps heal relationship wounds and rebuild trust

Individual Counseling Benefits

• Explores personal attachment history and patterns
• Addresses individual emotional regulation needs
• Works through past traumas affecting relationships
• Develops self-awareness and personal growth
• Builds confidence and reduces anxiety
• Provides personalized coping strategies
• Complements couples work with individual healing

Whether you're looking to strengthen your relationship together or work on personal growth that benefits your partnership, professional support can make a meaningful difference. Our experienced therapists specialize in attachment-based approaches and are here to help you build the secure, fulfilling relationship you deserve.

Schedule Your Consultation Today