Finding an Infidelity Therapist Near You

Feb 10

Written By A G

Not every therapist is equipped to work with infidelity. Knowing what to look for, and what questions to ask, can save you from starting over with the wrong fit at the worst possible time.

Searching for an infidelity therapist near you is a reasonable starting point, but geography matters less than it used to. Telehealth has made it possible for anyone in Maine, Montana, or Texas to access a therapist who specializes in exactly what they're navigating, without limiting their options to whoever happens to be within driving distance. This guide walks through what to look for, what questions to ask, and what to expect when you reach out.

Infidelity therapy at Sagebrush Counseling. We work with individuals and couples navigating affairs and betrayal via telehealth throughout Maine, Montana, and Texas. Join from anywhere in your state.

Schedule a Complimentary Consult →

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Why Specialization Matters for Infidelity Therapy

Infidelity is one of the most researched areas in couples and individual therapy, and the approaches that tend to work are specific. A therapist who is a generalist may be skilled in many areas but may not have the clinical framework to navigate the particular dynamics that infidelity creates: the acute trauma response, the attachment injuries, the question of whether to stay or leave, the complex work of rebuilding trust if both partners want to try.

Working with a therapist who has specific experience in this area means you're less likely to spend the early sessions educating them on what you're going through, and more likely to feel that the work is actually calibrated to where you are. That's worth looking for, and it's worth asking about directly when you reach out.

It's also worth noting that infidelity therapy looks different depending on whether you're coming as an individual or as a couple. If you're the hurt partner and not sure whether your relationship will survive, individual therapy can be a place to process what you're feeling and figure out what you want before any joint work begins. If you're the partner who had the affair and are carrying your own weight of shame and confusion, individual therapy offers a space for that too. And if both partners are in it together and want to work on the relationship directly, couples therapy is the place that work tends to happen. You can read more about the different ways we support both individuals and couples on our services page.

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Does "Near Me" Still Matter?

When most people search "infidelity therapist near me," they're looking for someone local out of habit or because they assume in-person is the only option. But location matters less than it used to, and for something as sensitive as infidelity, finding someone who is genuinely the right fit matters more than finding someone who is geographically convenient.

One important note: therapists are licensed by state, which means a telehealth therapist can only see clients who are located in the state or states where they hold a license. If you're searching from a state that isn't covered by a particular therapist's license, you'll need to either find a therapist licensed in your state or look for in-person options nearby. If in-person is the direction you go, searching for therapists in your closest city or town is the right starting point — therapist directories like Psychology Today and the AAMFT locator let you filter by location and specialty.

That said, if you are in a state where telehealth is available to you, opening up to virtual therapy significantly expands your options. Rather than being limited to therapists within a reasonable drive, you can access any licensed therapist throughout your entire state. For anyone in a smaller community, a rural area, or simply a place where infidelity specialists are scarce locally, that expansion can make a real difference in the quality of care available to you.

Telehealth also offers a practical advantage for infidelity specifically. Many couples and individuals in this situation have privacy concerns about being seen walking into a therapist's office. Sessions at home, or from wherever feels most private, remove that concern entirely. For people in smaller communities throughout rural Maine or Montana, or in parts of Texas where in-person options are limited, telehealth can be the difference between getting support and not getting it at all.

If you're in Maine, whether you're near Portland, Brunswick, or anywhere else in the state, telehealth means your options aren't limited to what's local. The same is true anywhere in Montana, and throughout Texas, including Austin, Houston, Dallas, and Midland.

Telehealth infidelity therapy for individuals and couples throughout Maine, Montana, and Texas.

Schedule a Complimentary Consult →

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What to Look for in an Infidelity Therapist

Here are the things worth paying attention to when you're evaluating whether a therapist is the right fit for what you're navigating.

Experience working with infidelity specifically

Look for a therapist who lists infidelity, affairs, or betrayal trauma as an area they work with regularly — not just someone who includes it in a broad list of relationship issues. Therapists who work in this area often reference specific frameworks like attachment-informed approaches or the three-stage model developed by Gordon, Baucom, and Snyder, which is one of the most well-researched approaches to infidelity recovery.

A non-judgmental stance toward both partners

Infidelity carries enormous moral weight, and a therapist who arrives with a verdict already formed is not going to be useful to either person. Look for language on a therapist's website or in a consultation that reflects genuine neutrality and curiosity rather than a framework where one person is clearly the wrongdoer and the other the victim. Both partners need a place to be honest, and that requires a therapist who can hold both experiences without choosing sides.

Clarity about whether they work with individuals, couples, or both

Some therapists specialize in one or the other. If you're coming as a couple, you want someone trained in couples therapy specifically, not just individual therapy applied to two people in the room. If you're coming as an individual, understanding whether the therapist also works with couples can be useful if joint sessions become part of the plan later.

Telehealth availability if access or privacy is a concern

If you're in a smaller community, concerned about privacy, or simply want more flexibility, a therapist who offers telehealth gives you significantly more options. All sessions at Sagebrush are virtual, which means you can join from wherever feels most comfortable — at home, at work, from your car. You can read more about what that looks like at how online therapy works at Sagebrush.

A complimentary consultation before committing

The therapeutic relationship matters enormously in infidelity work. Most therapists, including at Sagebrush, offer a brief consultation so both parties can get a sense of fit before committing to sessions. Use it. If something feels off in the first conversation, trust that feeling. You're going to be doing vulnerable work, and the relationship needs to feel safe enough to do it.

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How Infidelity Counseling Can Benefit a Couple

One of the most persistent myths about infidelity therapy is that it's only for couples who are on the edge of separation. In reality, counseling after an affair can be useful at many different points, and the benefits extend well beyond simply deciding whether to stay or leave. What therapy tends to offer is structure, a contained and supported space where conversations that feel too charged to have at home can actually happen.

For couples who want to work through what happened and find a way forward together, infidelity counseling offers a place to do that without the conversation spiraling or shutting down. Research by Gordon, Baucom, and Snyder identifies three broad phases that tend to characterize recovery: moving through the immediate impact, making sense of what happened and why, and — for couples who choose it — rebuilding. A therapist experienced in this work knows how to pace those phases and what each one requires.

Beyond the structure, here are some of the specific areas couples commonly work through in infidelity counseling:

Topics Couples Work Through in Infidelity Counseling

Processing the discovery and its immediate impact. The hurt partner is often in a state of acute distress that needs space before any forward-moving work can begin. Counseling provides that space without the conversation collapsing into further harm.
Understanding what led to the affair. Not assigning blame, but developing a shared understanding of the relational context — what was happening in the relationship, what needs weren't being met, and what conditions made the affair possible. This understanding is often what allows both partners to move forward rather than staying stuck in the event itself.
Rebuilding honesty and transparency. What does it mean to be trustworthy again? What does the hurt partner need to feel safe? What is the other partner willing to offer, and for how long? These are conversations that need structure and a neutral third party to have productively.
Addressing the attachment injury. Infidelity creates a rupture in the felt sense of security that partners provide each other. Therapy can help both partners understand what that rupture activated — often old fears and needs that predate the relationship — and begin to repair it.
Grief and ambivalence. Both partners often carry grief: for the relationship as it was, for the version of their partner they thought they knew, for the future they had imagined. That grief deserves room, and it's part of what counseling can hold.
Deciding what comes next. Not every couple who enters infidelity counseling stays together, and that's not a failure of the therapy. Counseling can support both the decision to rebuild and the decision to part in a way that is honest and intentional rather than reactive.

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Signs That Trust Has Already Been Affected

Sometimes people search for an infidelity therapist not immediately after a discovery but after months or years of carrying the weight of what happened. Trust erodes in ways that aren't always easy to name, and by the time people reach out they may be carrying patterns they don't fully connect to the original rupture. If you're not sure whether what you're experiencing is related to infidelity or something else in the relationship, it can help to understand what the signs of trust issues look like. We've written about that in more detail in our post on 5 signs of trust issues in a relationship.

You don't have to be in the immediate aftermath of a discovery to benefit from infidelity therapy. Some of the most important work happens months or years later, when the dust has settled but the distance hasn't.

The affair is not the whole story of a relationship. It's a chapter — and what you do next determines whether it's the last one.

— Esther Perel, The State of Affairs

Betrayal is the deepest wound a relationship can sustain. It is also one of the most common reasons people finally begin to do the work they always needed to do.

— Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight

You are not broken. You are in pain. Those are not the same thing, and one of them has a way through.

— For anyone finding their way after betrayal

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Finding an Infidelity Therapist in Maine, Montana, or Texas

If you're in Maine, Montana, or Texas and looking for an infidelity therapist, Sagebrush offers telehealth sessions for both individuals and couples throughout all three states. You don't need to be near a specific city. You need a therapist, a private space, and a connection.

For those in Maine, we serve the entire state, including the Portland area and the Brunswick area and beyond. In Montana, we serve clients anywhere in the state, including the Billings area. In Texas, we're available to anyone in the state, including those in Austin, Houston, Dallas, and Midland.

At Sagebrush Counseling

We work with individuals and couples navigating infidelity using an attachment-informed, relational approach. Whether you're in the immediate aftermath of a discovery, working through something that happened months ago, or unsure whether your relationship can recover, the consultation is a low-stakes place to start. You don't need to have it figured out before you reach out.

Infidelity therapy, trust issues, and relationship repair are a core part of what we do. You can read more about the full range of ways we work on our services page.

Serving clients throughout

Maine · Montana · Texas

All sessions via telehealth. Join from anywhere in your state.

Find an Infidelity Therapist at Sagebrush

Individual and couples therapy for infidelity and betrayal. Join from anywhere in Maine, Montana, or Texas — all sessions are virtual.

Schedule a Complimentary Consultation

Finding the right infidelity therapist takes a little more effort than a quick search, but it's worth it. The right fit can make the difference between work that moves something and work that stalls. If you're in Maine, Montana, or Texas and want to find out whether Sagebrush is the right fit, we'd be glad to talk.

— Sagebrush Counseling