Couples Tool
Attachment Style Quiz for Couples
Discover your individual attachment styles and how they interact as a couple — with strengths, dynamics, and guidance for your specific pairing.
About attachment styles
Attachment theory — developed by John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth — describes how early experiences shape the way we seek closeness, handle distance, and respond to emotional needs in relationships. There are four adult patterns, and none is a diagnosis or a flaw. Understanding yours as a couple opens the door to deeper empathy and less reactive conflict.
Secure
Anxious-Preoccupied
Dismissive-Avoidant
Fearful-Avoidant
Partner A
Answer honestly based on how you generally feel in close relationships — not just your best moments. There are no right answers.
Progress
0 of 16
Please answer all 16 questions.
Partner B
Now Partner B answers independently. Answer based on how you generally feel in close relationships.
Progress
0 of 16
Please answer all 16 questions.
Your Attachment Profile
Here are your individual styles and what your pairing means for your relationship.
A note for neurodivergent readers
If you or your partner are autistic, have ADHD, or are otherwise neurodivergent, some attachment behaviors may look different than described here. Difficulty reading social cues, sensory sensitivities, or a need for explicit communication can sometimes resemble avoidant or anxious patterns without reflecting the same underlying fear. Context and self-knowledge matter — use this as a starting point for conversation, not a final answer.
Want to explore your attachment patterns with a therapist?
Sagebrush Counseling offers online couples therapy across Texas, New Hampshire, Maine, and Montana.