PTSD & Infidelity Recovery Worksheet

Healing from betrayal trauma and rebuilding your sense of safety and trust

Understanding Betrayal Trauma

Discovering infidelity can cause trauma responses similar to PTSD. Your reactions are normal responses to an abnormal situation. Healing is possible with time, support, and the right tools.

How long ago did you discover the infidelity?

Less than 1 week 1-4 weeks 1-3 months 3-6 months 6-12 months Over 1 year

How would you rate the current impact of this betrayal on your daily life?

Minimal impact Completely overwhelming

Describe what happened when you discovered the infidelity:

What has been the most difficult part of dealing with this betrayal?

Trauma Symptoms Assessment

Betrayal can trigger trauma responses. Check any symptoms you've experienced since discovering the infidelity.

Re-experiencing symptoms - Check all that apply:

Intrusive thoughts about the betrayal Nightmares or disturbing dreams Flashbacks to discovering the infidelity Vivid mental images you can't control Feeling like it's happening all over again Physical reactions to reminders

Avoidance symptoms - Check all that apply:

Avoiding places that remind you of the betrayal Avoiding certain people or conversations Not wanting to think or talk about it Staying busy to avoid feelings Isolating from friends and family Difficulty remembering details about the betrayal

Negative changes in thoughts and mood - Check all that apply:

Negative beliefs about yourself ("I'm not enough") Negative beliefs about others ("People can't be trusted") Blaming yourself for the infidelity Persistent sadness, fear, or anger Loss of interest in activities you used to enjoy Feeling detached from loved ones Inability to feel positive emotions Feeling hopeless about the future

Changes in physical reactions - Check all that apply:

Hypervigilance (constantly on guard) Exaggerated startle response Difficulty concentrating Sleep problems (falling asleep, staying asleep) Irritability or angry outbursts Self-destructive or reckless behavior

Which symptom has been most disruptive to your daily life?

Immediate Safety & Stabilization

Focus first on stabilizing your emotional and physical well-being. Healing happens from a foundation of safety and self-care.

Grounding Techniques

For when you feel overwhelmed or triggered

5-4-3-2-1 technique (5 see, 4 hear, 3 feel, 2 smell, 1 taste) Deep breathing exercises Hold ice cubes or splash cold water Progressive muscle relaxation Mindful movement or stretching

Basic Self-Care

Essential needs during trauma recovery

Eating regular, nourishing meals Staying hydrated Getting adequate sleep Gentle exercise or movement Limiting alcohol and substances

Emotional Regulation

Managing intense emotions

Journaling thoughts and feelings Talking to trusted friends or family Crying when you need to Mindfulness meditation Creative expression (art, music, writing)

Creating Safety

Building a sense of security

Establishing daily routines Setting boundaries with others Creating a safe physical space Limiting exposure to triggers Seeking professional support

Create your personal crisis plan - What will you do when symptoms feel overwhelming?

Processing the Betrayal

When you feel ready, processing the trauma can help you move toward healing. Go at your own pace and seek professional support if needed.

Impact on your sense of self and world:

Area	Before the Betrayal	After the Betrayal
How I see myself
How I view relationships
My sense of trust
My future outlook

Challenging unhelpful thoughts:

Trauma can create distorted thoughts. Practice challenging these with evidence and compassion.

Unhelpful Thought	More Balanced Perspective

What emotions do you need to feel and express about this betrayal?

What do you need to grieve about this experience?

Rebuilding Trust & Safety

Whether you're working on your relationship or preparing to leave, rebuilding your sense of trust and safety is essential for healing.

Current status of your relationship:

Still together, working on rebuilding Separated but considering reconciliation Decided to end the relationship Still deciding what to do

If working on the relationship, what do you need to feel safe? Check all that apply:

Complete honesty about the affair No contact with the affair partner Transparency with devices and passwords Couples therapy Individual therapy for partner who cheated Regular check-ins about feelings Consistent actions matching words Time and patience for healing Acknowledgment of the pain caused Space to express emotions without defensiveness

Building trust in yourself:

Trust Area	How You'll Rebuild It
Trust in your intuition
Trust in your worth and value
Trust in your ability to handle challenges
Trust in your decision-making

What boundaries do you need to establish to feel safe right now?

Support System & Professional Help

Healing from betrayal trauma is challenging to do alone. Building a strong support network is crucial for recovery.

Types of support you're open to:

Individual therapy specializing in betrayal trauma Couples therapy (if working on relationship) Support groups for betrayed partners Trusted friends and family Online communities and forums Spiritual or religious support Books and educational resources Medical support (if sleep/anxiety medications needed)

Your current support network:

Person/Resource	Type of Support	How to Contact

Who in your life can you trust with your feelings right now?

What prevents you from reaching out for support?

Healing & Moving Forward

Healing is a journey, not a destination. Focus on progress, not perfection, and be patient with yourself as you rebuild your life.

Your healing goals:

Time Frame	Healing Goal	Steps to Take
Next 2 weeks
Next month
Next 3 months
Next 6 months

Signs of healing to watch for:

Decreased intensity of intrusive thoughts Better sleep patterns Ability to enjoy activities again Feeling more like yourself Increased sense of personal power Less fear about the future Ability to trust your instincts More good days than bad days

What would healing look like for you personally?

What gives you hope for your future?

Commitment to Your Healing Journey

Today, I commit to my healing by:

One thing I want to remember on difficult days:

One specific action I will take this week to support my healing:

Signature & Date:

You are stronger than you know. Healing is possible, and you deserve peace, trust, and love in your life.