DBT for Neurodivergence Skills Guide

🧠 DBT for Neurodivergence 🌟

Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Adapted for Neurodivergent Minds

Understanding DBT Through a Neurodivergent Lens

Traditional DBT wasn't designed with neurodivergent brains in mind.

This guide adapts DBT's four core modules—Mindfulness, Distress Tolerance, Emotion Regulation, and Interpersonal Effectiveness—to work WITH your neurodivergent brain, not against it.

Key Adaptations:
  • Sensory-friendly alternatives to traditional techniques
  • Stim-incorporating strategies
  • Executive function supports built in
  • Respect for different processing styles
  • Validation of neurodivergent experiences

Choose Your Skills Module

🧘
Mindfulness
Awareness skills adapted for sensory differences and attention variations
🛡️
Distress Tolerance
Crisis survival skills that work with meltdowns and shutdowns
🌊
Emotion Regulation
Understanding and working with intense emotions and alexithymia
💬
Interpersonal Effectiveness
Communication skills honoring different social processing

Skills by Module

🧘 Mindfulness
🛡️ Distress Tolerance
🌊 Emotion Regulation
💬 Interpersonal

Neurodivergent-Adapted Mindfulness

🎯 Stim Mindfulness

Use your stims AS mindfulness practice:

  • Notice the texture/movement/sound of your stim
  • Count rocking motions or fidget spins
  • Focus on the sensory input from your stim toy
ND Tip: Your natural stims are already mindfulness tools—you don't need to sit still!
🎨 Special Interest Meditation

Use your special interests as anchors:

  • Visualize details about your special interest
  • Mentally organize facts or collections
  • Trace patterns related to your interest
🔄 Pattern Recognition Mindfulness

Leverage your pattern-seeking brain:

  • Count ceiling tiles or floor patterns
  • Notice repeating sounds or rhythms
  • Find sequences in your environment

My Mindfulness Toolkit

Crisis Survival for ND Brains

🧊 TIPP for Sensory Seekers

Temperature: Ice packs, cold shower, frozen oranges
Intense exercise: Jumping, spinning, pressure
Paced breathing: With visual aids or counting
Paired muscle relaxation: Squeeze and release with pressure

Sensory Warning: Modify intensity based on your sensory profile—what's calming for one person might be overwhelming for another.
🎯 ACCEPTS - ND Version
  • Activities: Special interest deep dive
  • Contributing: Info-dump to help someone
  • Comparisons: Compare to past successes
  • Emotions: Watch/read comfort media
  • Push away: Schedule worry time
  • Thoughts: Count, list, categorize
  • Sensations: Weighted blanket, compression

My Meltdown/Shutdown Plan

Emotion Regulation for Intense Feelings

🌡️ Emotion Identification for Alexithymia

When you can't name emotions, track body signals:

💓
Heart Rate

Fast = anxiety/excitement

🫁
Breathing

Shallow = stress

💪
Muscle Tension

Tight = anger/fear

🌡️
Temperature

Hot = overwhelm

🔋
Energy

Depleted = sadness

🌀
Stomach

Churning = anxiety

⚖️ PLEASE Skills - ND Adapted

Reduce vulnerability to emotion mind:

  • PL - Treat Physical iLlness (including sensory needs)
  • E - Balance Eating (respect safe foods & sensory needs)
  • A - Avoid mood-Altering substances
  • S - Balance Sleep (honor your sleep cycle)
  • E - Get Exercise (stimming counts!)
ND Addition: Add "R" for Routine—maintaining predictable patterns reduces emotional vulnerability.

My Emotion Regulation Plan

Communication Skills for Different Neurotypes

📝 DEAR MAN with Scripts

Pre-written templates for difficult conversations:

Describe: "The situation is..."
Express: "I feel/think/need..."
Assert: "I would like..."
Reinforce: "This would help because..."

Mindful: Stay on script if needed
Appear confident: Even if masking
Negotiate: "Would X work instead?"

ND Adaptation: Write it out first! Use email or text when possible. Practice with someone safe.
🎭 FAST - Unmasked Version

Be true to your neurotype:

  • Fair: To yourself AND others
  • Apologies: Only when actually wrong (not for being ND)
  • Stick to values: Including need for accommodations
  • Truthful: About your needs and limits
🔄 GIVE - Different Communication Styles

Respectful interaction across neurotypes:

  • Gentle: Directness isn't rudeness
  • Interested: Info-dumping can show interest
  • Validate: Different processing is valid
  • Easy manner: Stimming is okay

My Communication Accommodations

Building Your Personal DBT Toolkit

Daily Skills Practice

Morning Regulation Routine:

Evening Wind-Down:

Weekly Skills Goals

Crisis Quick Reference

🚨 When Everything Is Too Much

Immediate Actions:

  1. Remove yourself from situation
  2. Find quiet/dark space
  3. Use strongest sensory tool
  4. No decisions for 20 minutes
  5. Stim freely

After Crisis:

  1. Gentle re-entry
  2. Special interest comfort
  3. Hydrate and safe food
  4. Rest without guilt
  5. Routine when ready

Neurodivergent DBT Wisdom

Key Principles to Remember

"Your brain works differently, not wrongly."

DBT skills are tools, not rules. Adapt them to fit YOUR nervous system.

Stimming IS regulation. Special interests ARE coping. Your needs ARE valid.

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