Inner Critic vs. Inner Compassion Voice
A Therapeutic Worksheet for Developing Self-Compassion
Part 1: Understanding Your Inner Voices
We all have internal dialogue that can either support or undermine our well-being. Learning to recognize and shift from self-criticism to self-compassion is a powerful tool for mental health and personal growth.
1. How would you describe your typical inner dialogue or self-talk?
2. When you make a mistake or face a challenge, what does your inner voice typically say?
3. How does your inner critic typically affect your mood, behavior, and relationships?
Part 2: Identifying Inner Critic Patterns
The inner critic often uses specific patterns of thinking. Check all the critical self-talk patterns you recognize in yourself:
All-or-nothing thinking ("I'm a complete failure")
Name-calling ("I'm so stupid/worthless")
Comparison to others ("Everyone else is better")
Perfectionism ("It has to be perfect or it's no good")
Mind reading ("They think I'm incompetent")
Catastrophizing ("This will ruin everything")
Should statements ("I should be doing better")
Dismissing positives ("That doesn't count")
Future predicting ("I'll never succeed")
Blame and guilt ("It's all my fault")
4. What are some specific phrases your inner critic uses most often?
Part 3: Comparing Inner Critic vs. Inner Compassion
Understanding the difference between self-criticism and self-compassion helps you recognize when to shift your internal dialogue.
Inner Critic Voice
- Harsh and judgmental
- Focuses on flaws and failures
- Uses "should" and "must" language
- Compares to others negatively
- Demands perfection
- Predicts worst-case scenarios
- Offers no solutions, only criticism
- Increases anxiety and shame
Inner Compassion Voice
- Kind and understanding
- Acknowledges struggles with gentleness
- Uses supportive, encouraging language
- Recognizes common humanity
- Accepts imperfection as human
- Focuses on learning and growth
- Offers comfort and practical solutions
- Promotes healing and resilience
Part 4: Developing Your Inner Compassion Voice
Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness you would offer a good friend. Practice developing compassionate responses to common self-critical situations.
| Situation | Inner Critic Response | Inner Compassion Response |
|---|---|---|
| Made a mistake at work | ||
| Didn't meet a personal goal | ||
| Social interaction didn't go well | ||
| Feeling overwhelmed by responsibilities | ||
| Comparing yourself to others |
Part 5: Compassionate Self-Talk Phrases
Having ready phrases can help you shift to self-compassion in difficult moments. Check the phrases that resonate with you and add your own.
"This is a moment of suffering"
"I'm not alone in feeling this way"
"May I be kind to myself"
"I'm doing the best I can right now"
"It's okay to make mistakes"
"I'm learning and growing"
"What do I need right now?"
"I deserve the same compassion I give others"
"This feeling will pass"
"I am worthy of love and acceptance"
5. Write 3 personal compassionate phrases that feel authentic to you:
Phrase 1:
Phrase 2:
Phrase 3:
Part 6: The Three Components of Self-Compassion
Dr. Kristin Neff identifies three key components of self-compassion. Practice applying each component to a current challenge you're facing.
6. Describe a current situation where you're being self-critical:
Component 1: Self-Kindness (vs. Self-Judgment)
Treating yourself with warmth and understanding rather than harsh criticism
What would you say to a friend in this situation? Now apply that same kindness to yourself:Component 2: Common Humanity (vs. Isolation)
Recognizing that suffering and imperfection are part of the shared human experience
How might others experience similar struggles? How does this connect you to others rather than isolate you?Component 3: Mindfulness (vs. Over-Identification)
Observing your thoughts and feelings without being overwhelmed by them
What thoughts and feelings are you experiencing? (Observe without judgment) How can you hold these feelings with balanced awareness?Part 7: Self-Assessment & Progress Tracking
Rate yourself on the following statements using the scale below:
Never
Rarely
Sometimes
Often
Always
12345
Daily Self-Compassion Practice Log
Track your practice of shifting from inner critic to inner compassion for one week.
| Day | Self-Critical Moment | Compassionate Response Used | Impact on Mood (1-5) |
|---|---|---|---|
| Monday | |||
| Tuesday | |||
| Wednesday | |||
| Thursday | |||
| Friday | |||
| Saturday | |||
| Sunday |
Key Takeaway
Remember: Developing self-compassion is a practice, not a destination. The inner critic may never completely disappear, but you can learn to recognize it and choose a kinder, more supportive inner voice. Self-compassion is not self-indulgence or self-pity—it's about treating yourself with the same care and understanding you would offer a good friend facing similar challenges.